Welcome back to the final three battles of Pack Wars! Battle Blaster I. Just a reminder, I am certainly willing to accept sponsorship for this feature. It's time to get into it, because we've get three battles to get to today.

Battle 3
Albert V vs. Albert VI

Albert V
Ramon Hernandez
Carlos Santana (+1 for following the ball with his eyes)
Ryan Sweeney
Eric Sogard (+1) (Athletics)
Hanley Ramirez Cut Above insert
James Shields
Travis Snider (+1 for sporting a Gerald McRaney moustache)
Alfonso Soriano

Total Score: 3

I bet you think I should give that die-cut HanRam card at least a point, right? Well, I'll refer you to the official scoring "+2 Any other insert card that's worth keeping" (italics mine). Frankly, I don't get the die-cut craze. If it's a player I collect, I'd keep it. Otherwise, nil points.

A Gerald McRaney moustache, on the other hand, is worth celebrating and rewarding.

Albert VI
Matt Thornton (+1) (White Sox)
Tommy Hunter (+1) (Orioles)
Chris Volstad
Chase Headley (+1) (Gold)
Golden Giveaway (0 - I unlocked Lou Gehrig, who I immediately traded for Roberto Clemente)
Elvis Andrus
Nathan Eovaldi (+1 for having the very rare "EO" combination in front of his name)
John Mayberry

Total Score: 4

Now, before you start complaining that my random point for Nathan Eovaldi having two vowels at the front of his name broke the tie, handing the win to Albert VI, I would like to point out that I gave a point to Travis Snider for a freakin' moustache! Albert VI was going to win, anyway.

See, it's not completely random.

Battle 4
Albert VII vs. Albert VIII

Albert VII
Willie Bloomquist (-1 for wearing a "Los Dbacks" jersey - c'mon, that's not even real Spanish!)
Carlos Gonzalez
Scott Hairston
Josh Hamilton Career Day insert (+1 for being from Raleigh)
Joe Mauer '87 mini (+2)
Ricky Romero
Tsuyoshi Nishioka
Daniel Murphy

Total Score: 2

What a stinker. If it wasn't for the inserts, the pack would have finished in double digits. And before you ask, any Brewers that appeared in "Cervezeros" jerseys would indeed get bonus points. Because "Cervezeros" is just plain cool. And proper Spanish.

Albert VIII
Carlos Zambrano (-1 for being a clubhouse cancer)
Alex Rodriguez (-5)
Alex Presley (+1 for being the second straight Alex in the pack)
Vladimir Guerrero checklist (+1) (Orioles)
Jim Palmer Golden Moments insert (+3) 
(Orioles +1, insert card I'm keeping +2)
Josh Collmenter
Kenley Jansen
Andy Dirks

Total Score: -1

I thought it was going to be much worse. I kinda felt bad docking Albert VIII a point for Zambrano when A-Fraud came up straight away, but to protect the integrity of Pack Wars I have to go with my first instinct when it comes to bonus points. Besides, I docked Albert VII a point for a totally capricious reason, too. Albert VII wins the battle. But really, we're all losers in this one.

Battle 5
Albert IX vs. Albert X

Albert IX
Andrew McCutchen
Chien-Ming Wang (+1 for "Heh-heh...you said 'Wang'")
Zach McAllister
Jim Palmer Mound Dominance insert (+3) (Orioles +1, insert card I'm keeping +2)
Nolan Ryan Gold Standard insert
Ian Kinsler (+1 for solid fundamentals)
Lonnie Chisenhall
Kerry Wood (+1 for retiring on his own terms)

Total Score: 6

Fun fact - both Jim Palmer insert cards referred to the same game - his start in the 1966 World Series at the tender age of 21. I almost thought of docking this card a point for that duplication, but decided to just not feature it instead.

Albert X
Nelson Cruz
Brandon Beachey
Luis Marte
Ichiro Suzuki Gold (+8) (+5 Gold parallel for my PC, +1 Mariner, +2 Ichiro)
Carlos Santana Gold Futures (+1)
Darwin Barney (+1 for diving/sliding headfirst)
Jason Kubel
Lance Berkman

Total Score: 10

What a way to end the first Pack Wars with a double-digit pack. True, it benefited from the points multiplier, but when you think about it, there are 660 cards in the set, and each has gold parallels. So the odds that I'm going to get one of the 3 gold cards I actually care about are...well, they're 1 in 220, actually...but that's good enough for a bunch of points, in my opinion.

Albert X takes out not only the final battle, but also posts the highest score of the whole blaster. Congratulations Albert X. You win...nothing.

Here we go - the first installment of Pack Wars! Come to think of it, I kinda like the title "Battle Blaster" better. And Rule 1 of Pack Wars Battle Blasters is that capriciousness and whims are the order of the day. On with the show...

Battle #1
Pack 1 vs. Pack 2

I liked in better back in 2009, when Topps would put different players on the front of packs. This time, we just have ten Albert Pujolses battling each other. Here we have Albert I vs. Albert II

Albert I
J.J. Hardy (+1) (Orioles)
Dan Haren
Grant Balfour (+3)
Phil Niekro Mound Dominance insert
Albert Pujols Career Day insert
Chase Utley (+1 for sliding/diving headfirst - a.k.a. the Pete Rose bonus)
Alex Gonzalez
Chris Johnson (-1) (Astros)

Total score: 4

One pack in, and I've already shown my capriciousness. I've decided to award Grant Balfour an extra point for wearing the gold A's jersey, and another point for being an Aussie. I can't believe I didn't include that as a category. It is so forever enshrined, and I'll be updating the official scoring system

Albert II
Gaby Sanchez
Brett Gardner (-1) (Yankees)
Wade Miley
Andruw Jones (+1) (Gold) (-1) Yankees = A big, fat zero
Cliff Lee
Zack Cozart (+2)
Robert Andino (+1) (Orioles)
Gerardo Parra

Total score: 3

Zack Cozart gets one point for being a Red, and a bonus point for being one of my favorite Reds. As the cliche goes, "he plays the game the right way." Still, it's not enough - Battle #1 goes to Albert I! It's the leader in the clubhouse, but something tells me 4 points isn't going to hold up. Shall we have another battle? Sounds good!

Battle #2
Albert III vs. Albert IV

Albert III
Nick Swisher (-1) (Yankees)
Buster Posey (+1) (Orange uniform)
Dan Uggla - not even the base card, the checklist
Ty Cobb Gold Standard insert (-1 for being a horrible human being)
Ken Griffey Jr. 1987 mini (+8)
Carlos Quentin (+1 for the smirk on his face)
Mark Ellis
Frank Francisco (+1 for having the same first and last name)

Total score: 9

Not even having both a smug Yankee outfielder and an unrepentant racist can hold this pack down! Not when there's the coolest insert card in the set! To be honest, I had no idea that Series 2 '87 mini cards featured retired players. And when I was creating the scoring system, I had forgotten that Junior and Topps had kissed and made up, and that he was now featured in 2012 Topps. Since my other PCs get two points, I figure Griffey is worth double because he's retired. Along those same lines, I doubled the '87 mini bonus, too. That's how I got 8 points. See, it's not completely random.

The bonus points for Carlos Quentin and Frank Francisco, well, yeah, that is pretty random.

Albert IV
Rafael Furcal
Gio Gonzalez (+1 for being a part of the Nationals all-conquering rotation)
Charlie Furbush (+1) (Mariners)
Ozzie Smith Golden Moments insert
Domonic Brown Gold Futures insert (+1)
Chris Carpenter
Tim Lincecum (+2)
Carlos Pena

Total Score: 5

Who packed this pack, Tony LaRussa? The last time I saw this many Cardinals in one place was the NL All-Star team. That reminds me - fair warning: if I see LaRussa's mug pop up I'm going to give him -10 points for the way he treated Johnny Cueto and Brandon Phillips. I resisted the urge to give Charlie Furbush a bonus point for his vaguely obscene last name. That kind of stuff shouldn't be celebrated.

Poor Albert IV. That score would have won Battle #1, but it had the bad luck to go up against Mini Griffey. Oh well, that's the way the cookie crumbles. A strong score by Albert III, will it hold up against six more packs? All will be revealed...tomorrow!

A silly idea I "came up" with while driving up to Perth today...

I bought a few blaster packs of Series 2, and rather than just open them up and post the contents, I wondered how I could have some fun with them. Why not have the packs "battle" against each other for the title of most badass pack in the blaster? Of course, some sort of points or ratings system would need to be devised in order to determine the winner.

Going on the idea that the best (or at least funniest) point systems are completely random (see Whose Line is it Anyway? or RockWiz), here's some ideas. I've got three blasters, so the points system could change completely from one blaster to the next. I will, however, keep it consistent between all packs in a blaster, or else my fake competition won't be fair to the inanimate competitors. And we can't have that, can we?

Provisional point system:
+1  Reds, Orioles, White Sox, Mariners or Athletics
+1  Gold Futures (one of two insert series I'm actually collecting)
+1  Gold card
+1  for wearing a throwback jersey
+1  for being Australian
+1  for being from Raleigh, N.C.
+2  Ichiro, King Felix and The Freak
+2  1987 Mini (the other insert, and one that's twice as cool as Gold Futures)
+2  Any other insert card that's worth keeping, not trading away
+2  Golden Giveaway card (but only if it unlocks something cool)
+3  Short Print
+3  Gold card I actually give a damn about
+5  Gold card for my PC
+5  Gold card that's an SP (Gatorade or otherwise)
+8  Relic or auto (in a blaster?!?)
+10  Any card that prominently features seagulls chasing ballplayers

-1   Yankees, Astros
-3   Any card that has already been pulled in that blaster (this may disadvantage later packs, but honestly, duplicates in a blaster is inexcusable)
-5   Alex Rodriguez
-100  Alex Rodriguez relic or auto (seriously, what a waste)

Points are cumulative, so an Alex Rodriguez card would actually be worth -6, unless he's wearing a Rangers jersey for some reason, then it would be -5. You get the picture.

I reserve the right to add or subtract points for unforseen circumstances, or just because I really like or dislike a particular card.

I'll start the competition with my first blaster, and go from there. There's ten packs, numbered from 1 to 10 (duh!) in the order that I pulled them out of the blaster (double duh!). Pack 1 will battle Pack 2, Pack 3 vs. Pack 4, and so on. This doesn't exactly lend itself to a bracket, since all the information will be out there following the first round. I've already opened the manu-patch, and it's a retired number card of Hall-of-Famer Rod Carew.

Any predictions on which pack (1 through 10) will be the winner? Results to come tomorrow.